Could Your Self-Talk be the Magic Bullet?

Could your self-talk be the missing link to your success?

It can be a challenge to be “successful” and still feel stuck, even trapped in your status quo.  Do you feel like your personal emergency brake is pulled up & on while your inner gear is pointing to drive? Petal to the metal with the break still on!

Here is a question to ask yourself to ease the inner breaking system – am I selling my self short by “playing not to lose” rather than “playing to win” ?  This type of “habit” can hide in the form of perfectionism. 

Those are a few clues your inner dialog could use a review.

Let me ask you this – are you still connected to your higher mission? 

Are you still excited about your job, your relationships, and your life?  Is there a spark of passion still burning that brought you into your business, and your relationships (all kinds)?  Or are you feeling disconnected from your purpose in parts of your life?

Now let me ask you the question again and see if it sparks an interest. Could how you talk to yourself be the missing link? I would like to explore that with your for a quick minute…

What is self-talk ?

Self-talk is the way we talk to ourselves either out-loud, but mostly what we quietly say in our mind.

The voice in our head that is either playing subtly in the background or loud and clear as we go about our day.

It’s that non-stop inner chatter that goes on about the opinion of ourselves, other people, and what’s around us.

It’s the stories we tell ourselves over and over, so often they have become a habit.

Why does it matter?

Most of our emotions, our moods, and our feelings are determined by our self-talk.

What we say to ourselves influences how we feel about what goes on around us, and how we react to it. That’s huge! Take that one in with a deep breath.

This inner dialog can form the opinion we have of ourselves. Inner speech leads immediately to an inner image. Let me ask you ( it’s a coach thing…to ask provocative questions)….Do you know what your inner opinion of yourself is?

Our brain processes what we say silently to ourselves more rapidly then what we say out loud.  It’s how our brain is organized and wired.

Our mind will fulfill what is said in part because self-talk occurs in the same part of the brain that executes behavior.

The power of self-talk comes from an alignment of your whole being with what you want. Yes…that alignment thing again! It’s part of your connection to your inner image and how you see yourself in the world.


Begin to notice what you are saying to yourself.

What runs through your mind daily?

What are you saying when things don’t seem to be working out for you?

Your personal compassion with yourself is the key element to positive self-talk.

Sooth with kindness the talk that stops you from moving forward.

Give yourself loving self-talk that counters your negative programming.

Re-frame your inner dialog to positively and consistently represent how you want to feel inside, what you want to reflect outside, and what you want to bring into your life.

There is a somatic component to this too that connects to your physical body.  We will be talking about this element further in later posts.  You can start by knowing of your  “Sea of Tranquility” acu-point in this diagram & more in my eBook

What to say when you talk to yourself:

Change the story as soon a you hear the old pattern playing in your head. Change the negative “here we go again, of course I’m having a hard time with ( fill in the blank) this always happens” to me.

How about a new story like “I’m going to patient with this (fill in the blank) and I am going to be extra patient with myself as I figure this out…and I will”. “I am a good person, and I choose to feel at ease right now”.

Include a physical touch such as your whole open palm on your “Sea of Tranquility” acu-point, breathe in slow and deep, and out long and fine while you think of the most loving way to re-frame your negative self-talk into a new useful dialog.

Check out these inspiring short videos to get you thinking about polishing up your inner dialog to expand your expressions and offerings to the world.

Here is a quick video by an Dr. Shad Helmstetter describing where self-talk comes from, and how it works in your brain. He also offers ideas how to align with what you want at a higher pinnacle.

This one is excellent with 5 quick tips in Brian Johnson’s 12 minute review of Shad Helmstetter’s book What to Say When You Talk to Yourself”.

What you say to yourself could indeed be the missing link to your success and even greater to your day-to-day, moment to moment joy! 

I hope you have been inspired to open your awareness to how you talk to yourself. 


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Do you have success yet you still feel there is something missing? I help you expand your model of success, go deeper and explore new ways of seeing how to fully embody your success, and connect deeper with your mission for the purpose of expanding your personal and professional quality of life.

The same ways of doing got you where you are, but will they take you where you want to go?

Let’s get curious about it, first call is on me.