Logic can seem like a distant illusion when the habit of fear is solidly in place.
Fear might sound like Elephants blasting in your ear, run for your life! Or it might be a bit more sophisticated and sound like a seemingly logical reason you should not try something new, or try something that felt like a “failure” before.
Fear or anxiety can even show up as a feeling and not really a clearly defined thought at all.
False Illusions Appearing Real…what the bleep! Qi Gong master Franz quoted this acronym during a retreat I attended: F is for False E is for Elusions (illusions) A is for Appearing R is for Real
False Illusions Appearing Real is a logical statement that sounds very empowering as long as you are not in the middle of it!
Fear is a learned process used to keep us away from situations that produce emotions we are uncomfortable with. That feels very REAL! It is also the strongest way we keep living out of alignment with our highest self. Some call it living small.
Or….. F**k Everything And Run
This same teacher went on to describe the more accurate “feeling” behind fear. Fear has a purpose. It’s to keep you safe; it’s as simple as that. Sort of like a warning sign.
In fact we have a specific part of our brain that controls the flight, fight or freeze response which we needed to be on high alert back in early days of human existence.
We still have that part of our brain actively trying to protect us and giving us signals to pay attention, and to get out of danger. But what if there is no real danger, only perceived danger?
Our beautiful three-pound universe.
Your brain has a fantastic automatic system that can even make fear a habit for you. How convenient, thank you very much….I think?
Fear is a habit ????
The purpose is to not have to think, when you need to run. That is how your lower brain communicates automatically in a feedback loop with your emotional brain and your logical brain. It automatically responds to situations that may “seem” to cause you harm.
This feedback loop is wired to protect you.
It is nice to know you are having a normal response that you may have out grown, and that’s all it is. There is nothing broken about you, nothing to fix, just to unlearn.
Your brain has learned to push the fear button.
It’s automatic when the chance of unwanted stress, emotions, and thoughts appear to rise. You know it is learned because when you were a baby you had no such fears or responses.
When this process has played out enough times, the lower brain which controls the automatic responses says…OK, great, got it. You’re telling me that’s what works to keep away the potential danger, so I will take it over for you.
The danger is the emotion(s) you felt before, and want to guard against. Your brain says…..sure thing! You don’t even have to think about it anymore. I can add this to the breathing in and out thing we do for you too.
How do we rewire the automatic response…. the habit?
You are asking very little of your brain when you stop asking it to perfect new skills every day” says Rudy Tanzi, PhD in Neurology, as he describes the plastic abilities of our brain in his book “Super Brain”.
Sure the wiring of fear is there, but it is not a “hard wire job”. Our brain has neuroplasticity wired in it also! Plastic meaning moveable, mold-able, not hard and fixed, changeable. Rudy says it in many ways in “Super Brain”.
We are even more empowered by the objectivity of neuroplasticity.
Now that’s an empowering thought! Science has come up to speed with ancient wisdom. We do have the ability to decide what is not working for us and unplug it from the automatic brain response, and plug into a response of design, of choice, from our higher brain. Wow!
Tapping creates the bridge needed to dialog with the lower brain by letting it know it’s safe to take off the automatic response.
It does this in an energetic dialog and a cognitive dialog; by engaging your energetic body system (meridians/qi) with your neurological system (brain/thoughts). Both induce a chemical response which is what our body uses as a catalyst to interface our cellular structure. Our body communicates with its systems (Organs and such) from the circulation of Qi and chemicals.
Tapping works, it makes you feel good, and it empowers you to live your life big, in alignment with your highest self!
I don’t know what to say when I Tap!
Clients tell me, when I Tap by myself I am afraid I will do it wrong. I am going to let you in on a secret. It doesn’t matter as much what you say, as it does how you feel. You are very likely to know how you feel quite easily.
The Three Steps To Tapping
How to cross the bridge which closes the gap from how you feel now and how you want to feel, be, do, experience, let go of…..
Tapping is a bridge to communicate with all the parts of your physiology. These three steps provide a path to cross in a comfortable progression with the intention to:
1. Vent/bring Awareness: Bring to light the issue. To neutralize something uncomfortable/fearful, what is no longer serving your best interest, or keeping you stuck.
2. Desire: To explore your desires and arrive at feeling comfortable in your body, at peace in your mind, feeling safe, and feeling OK doing something different.
3. Choose: To have something else you prefer, feels good, and best serves you.
Before you begin the 3 part bridge you will need to address your natural resistance to change, by using a ‘reversal statement’ as part of your set up statement.
Here is a basic formula to say while you tap on the side of your hand on the Karate Chop point, and repeat it three times:
Even though I have this _________ and it is keeping me from______( or causing me ________), there is a part of me that is holding on to it, and I love and accept all the parts of me (or use a similar positive ending statement)
Example of Set & Reversal Statement:
Even though I am nervous about talking to my boss about a raise, it’s keeping me from asking for what I want. There is a part of me that is holding on to this fear, and I love and accept myself anyways.
Including the statement of what’s going on/how you are feeling, then stating what it’s keeping you from, combined with …. there is a part of me that is holding on to it…is the reversal and speaks to the less conscious parts of the brain that are holding the patterns in place…even if you can’t identify them right now.
Take a break between each round to see how you feel , and drink water.
Step 1-Awareness or venting round: Tap for 1 or 2 rounds.
Tap on how you currently feel.
Start with your awareness of how something does not feel right/good, has angered you, or feels uncomfortable, or anything else. As you continue to Tap the pull/charge will continue to go down.
You don’t need to relive the negative, so move on to the next step when you feel a little relief.
Note: You can scale your intensity 0-10 to start and between rounds. Measure so you can see how you are neutralizing the feelings. Keep track because a funny thing happens….you forget you had the problem and if you don’t measure the intensity to start with you may not realize the beneficial impact the Tapping had for you.
Example: I hate talking to my boss, he makes he make me nervous, I get tongue-tied, I get frustrated, my stomach gets all tied in knots, and I am afraid I will sound stupid.
Step 2-Desire: Tap for 2 to 4 rounds, or until you’re much calmer, or feel a significant shift.
Tap on how you want to feel.
Ask your self-questions like, how would it feel to not have this resistance to ______ right now? What would my body feel like? How would my life be different? Include a few statements about how it is safe to let go of the _________. You have to feel safe enough to let it go, so say as much as you need to about feeling safe.
Example:It sure would be great to feel at ease when I talk to my boss. I would like to feel ease in my body, speak clearly, and confidently.
Ping pong back and forth when you feel your “safety alarm” or otherwise “disbelief alarm” going off.
Example:I don’t have to be afraid of talking to my boss he’s not going to fire me about an idea! But he yells a lot and so did my dad, and I never want to feel that again. He is not my dad and I am not a little girl anymore. I have done my homework on this subject, and I know it well.
Move deeper into desire phrases once you get the feeling going. It’s all about the feelings…that’s what gets things moving.
Example:I would feel so great if I could speak to my boss with clarity and confidence; it would feel wonderful to be taken seriously on this subject. I really want the opportunity to present my knowledge to my boss with ease. I want to speak to Thomas (boss) with clarity confidence, and ease.
Stay on desire until you feel safe enough to choose something different for yourself. When you feel a substantial release from the pull the fear has on you….move to choice statements.
Step 3-Choice: Tap for 1 to 2 rounds.
Tap in positive choice statements:
Example:Instead of I choose not to be afraid of speaking to my boss Thomas…say I choose to enjoy the feeling of complete confidence when I speak to my boss Thomas. I choose to feel the calmness in my body. I choose to speak with clarity, and articulate my ideas with passion easily.
Continue to notice how you feel. The goal is to bridge the gap between how you have been feeling about something you have been resisting…..to feeling neutral, and even excited about the new experience.
From here become aware of the habits of fear and tap them down in this process as they unfold.
Tap often/daily and explore where it takes you. It’s like a flower that unfolds petal by petal. Enjoy the expansion!
Laura Long, Certified Pro EFT Practitioner Certified Acupressure Practitioner
Some times you need a little help pulling it all together, and to help you see around the corner of your blind spots which we all have. If you would like help aligning with your birth right to bliss then let’s talk.